Yes, I have been absent from my blogging. I literally forgot. How does one forget to blog? When ones loved ones are hurting and you can’t do anything to help them and you feel like the pain is your own.
That is how that past 7 weeks have been for me. I have been stressed beyond belief and have been praying my brains out. Literally. If the haunting topic pops up in my mind, I pray. Then pray again, harder. I have literally been trying to “give this to God”. It is soooo hard. Things out of our control (but we kinda wonder if we can do something or anything) are ridiculously hard to come to any peace with. Especially with our children.
What I have found is that kids are mean. Adults are mean, too, but we can choose whether or not to associate with them or for that fact, even have to see them. But kids, especially mine, are with the same kids day in and day out because our school is small. I used to think that it was amazing as they can build long time relationships, but now I see it can be a curse as well. I am mad, sad, overeating, under-eating, wishing it was me and just wondering what I can do to help.
I am not going to give any other details as I hope things will work them selves out and one day this too, will be behind us.
My conclusion, parenting is just PLAIN HARD. Every stage, every new challenge they face is a new one for me too! This just happens to be the trial that was set before us. I do not know how it will turn out but my faith is strong. Can your faith be strong and you worry at the same time? I, personally, think so. So, I will carry on. Love my kids with all of heart. And know, there is always a mountain and a valley. I’m not sure which one we are in, but I hope I am an example to my kids that we can face them both head on and be okay.